The other night, I walked across the street to give turnips to our neighbor. I left them on the chair on their front porch. When I was on their driveway, their two goats started yelling at me. I waved at them. A few minutes later, our neighbor texted me, saying they were out of town until Sunday. So, I went back across the street to get the turnips, intending to put them in our fridge until then. The goats started yelling at me again.

I texted the neighbor, saying the goats seemed upset about something. She said a relative was supposed to be checking in on them. She asked if we could check on them, too. So, Brian and I grabbed a flashlight, and walked over there again. Their large water bowl was almost empty (and was dirty), the other water bowls were empty and upside down, and their feed bowls were also empty. The neighbor was texting me, telling me where to find the hay and “special feed.” She warned us that they were escape artists, and to not let them get out. We were sure going to be careful about that! Imagine us chasing goats all over the neighborhood at night.

The goats are well-behaved when their owner is home. She lets them out in the yard to graze without any leashes. One even ended up in our yard one day. We’re always happy to let the neighbor’s goats mow our lawn! Unfortunately, our big dog, Tank, thinks they look like large stuffed animals.

We carefully opened the gate and, sure enough, the bigger one tried to make a run for it. Brian body-blocked him. I got the food, and handed it to Brian. They started chomping on their hay so Brian was able to come back out of the enclosure to locate a hose for the water bowl without having a wrestling match.

Nom nom nom!

When Brian tried to take the water bowl back in, the larger goat made another attempt at escape. Brian body blocked him again. I admit things were getting pretty funny by that point.

The Escape Artist

After we were finished, Brian put the bungee cords around the gate, and the boards, and cement block back in front of the chain link fence “door.” Brian checked on them the next morning, and fed and watered them again. He took some paracord with him to better secure the chain link fence closure. Immediately, one of the goats started chewing on the cord.

We had considered getting goats. But, not anymore. If you need to butcher them, it’s not much meat. Even if you get milk, I don’t think it would be much. They require a LOT of care and all that hay and feed can’t be cheap, to say nothing of the vet bills. And, if they’re constantly trying to escape, you can’t ever let your guard down. So, we will NOT be getting goats.

However, we told the neighbor to let us know when they’re out of town from now on because we will happily take care of them. They are ADORABLE!! And, they make the cutest sounds…when they’re not screaming at you.

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Angela Hoy lives on a mountain in North Georgia. She is the publisher of WritersWeekly.com, the President and CEO of BookLocker.com and AbuzzPress, and the author of 24 books.

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