Kids’ Orifices…

I was sitting next to Max in the RV on the way from New York to Massachusetts. He kept making blowing noises with his nose. When I saw him put his finger in his nose, I asked him if he needed a tissue. He replied, “No.”

I said, “Don’t you have boogies?”

He said, “No, it’s a rock.”

I became instantly alarmed. I said, “What do you mean a rock?”

He replied, “It’s a magic rock.”

A few days earlier, Frank had given Max some pebbles from a campground and told him they were magic.

I asked him to show me how big the “magic rock” was. He showed me with his fingers. It was certainly big enough to get stuck in his nasal passages! I knew if we didn’t get that rock out, we’d need to find a hospital, and fast.

I ordered him to keep his fingers OUT of his nose and I jumped up to get the tissues, my tweezers, and any other instrument I could find in the RV that may help unwedge a pebble from a nostril.

Right after I jumped up, I heard Max blow air out of his nose once again, and then heard Frank say, “It just flew out, Mom!”

I had to confirm it really did come out so I dug around his legs in his carseat and found a black pebble that was still wet. That was the one!

You can read more about our adventures on the road (sigh…), and see photos at:

This week’s Maxism:
We bought Max a new child’s umbrella at The Crayola Factory. That night, he opened it in our hotel room and was singing over and over again, “It’s raining, it’s boring. It’s raining, it’s boring…”

At the mass for Grandma last week, I was holding Mason and couldn’t hold and read the hymnal at the same time. Max was in the pew in front of us. He turned around and very loudly said, “Why aren’t you singin’, Mom?”

When the priest was taking the sacrament in the shiny chalise, Max, again, very loudly said, “What’s he drinkin’?”

P.S. Write your autobiography this Fall! Think you can’t remember your childhood? Yes you can, using my memory triggers! Sign up for my popular and FUN class, How to Remember, Write and Publish Your Life Story! See: