From The Home Office

This Town is Sooooo Small!!! (Part 3)

December 29, 2022

This Town is Sooooo Small!!! (Part 3)
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Two weeks ago, I told you about Bonnie, our local grocery store clerk who knows WAY too much about people in this town.

Last week, I told you about our neighbor (who Mason delivers free produce to) being the nurse at our new doctor’s office, and about our new, guffawing grocery store buddy, Earl.

I have another funny grocery store story. A couple of weeks ago, I was at the store stocking up on things for our Christmas Eve party. I needed plenty of food for our annual fondue, along with beer and wine and, since the beer and wine are right next to the door, that’s where I headed first. I got a 12-pack of Corona and several bottles of white and red wine. White for the cheese fondue…and for drinking, of course. And, Brian always cooks his venison stew in red wine. He serves it in a puff pastry and it is EVERYBODY’S favorite!!

Next, I needed eggnog and milk so I turned my cart left, and headed for the dairy section. As soon as I rounded the corner, about 10 feet in front of me was Mitch from church. He was looking at the cheese. I glanced down at my cart. There was literally nothing in it except alcohol. Not wanting the local tongues wagging about my grocery cart, I ducked my head, covered my right cheek with my hand, did a 180-degree turn (not easy with just one hand!), and bolted before he noticed me.

I quickly walked all the way across the store to the produce section to start filling the cart with, you know, healthy stuff (broccoli and cauliflower for the cheese fondue, and strawberries for the chocolate fondue). I then headed to the bakery for loaves of French bread (also for the cheese fondue). My cart still looked like it belonged to a lush so my eyes kept darting back and forth as I passed from one aisle to the next.

As I emerged from aisle 3 (getting marshmallows for the chocolate fondue), near the meat department, I almost ran my cart into another one. And, pushing the other cart was Betty from our Sunday School class. She and I said hello, and exchanged a couple of pleasantries. Then, she looked down at the bottles in my cart, looked back up at me, winked, turned her cart to the left, and silently waved as she walked away. I swear I saw wrinkled noses, and heard some silent snickers at Sunday School the following weekend.

Next Christmas, I’m going to the liquor store. Maybe I won’t know anybody there…

Next week I’ll tell you about the person in this small town (of 2,201 people) who literally EVERYBODY knows.

Oh. I almost forgot. This past week, we unwittingly got roped into taking care of our neighbor’s goats. They were supposed to have a relative check on them while they were out of town but we never saw any car pull up there. So, Brian had to go over there twice a day to give them fresh water. Why? Because it was so cold here that their little water bowl was almost instantly freezing over. We have other neighbors who have new cows and horses and they don’t yet have a barn. When we had wind chills of -10 to -20 one night last week, I was feeling so sorry for those poor animals. 🙁

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Angela Hoy lives on a mountain in North Georgia. She is the publisher of WritersWeekly.com, the President and CEO of BookLocker.com and AbuzzPress, and the author of 24 books.

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