World’s Worst Query Letters and Book Proposals For July, 2020!

World’s Worst Query Letters and Book Proposals For July, 2020!

Oh, yes! We know you’re excited!! Today, we’re going to share another installment of our popular column, World’s Worst Query Letters and Book Proposals.

We’ve been savings these for a few weeks now so there are a LOT to entertain you! As always, I’ve saved the best for last!

Featured below are real quotes from query letters and book proposals submitted to us over the past few weeks. Yes, we can learn from others’ mistakes.

In case you’re a new reader, please know that we are a publication about writing and publishing FOR WRITERS. When someone contacts us using our online contact form, directly above that form is a link to our writer’s guidelines, in a very large, bold, red font. The link to our guidelines is also at the top of every page on our website.

That’s a heckuva run-on sentence!

Hai mam, hope you fine, iam writing real life stories, incidents, are you accepting those kinds of articles?

This guy must have gone to the same school as the one above. 

Hi, I would like to display my words to the world through writers weekly, may I know the subjects, that you prefer the most. 

I don’t… I mean… What???

ethnicity, religious faith, this like article’s acceptable

Clearly, this person knows nothing about our website. 

Will u accept articles relating to legal subjects?

An eight-word query with no capital letters or punctuation.

yes dear i want to write for you

I don’t know. How did you??

how did i submit my article

I’m a publisher, not a therapist. 

I would like to sit down and talk about my life and experiences

It’s Harper Collins and they don’t charge authors a fee to publish a book. So, no, your manuscript was NOT really “approved” by them. I’m surprised you thought someone in the publishing business wouldn’t know that. 

This project was approved by Hipper Collins publishing firm since last year but due to finance I have been unable to publish

When they say they want to post with a link, that means they want to put advertorials on our site. I ignore these emails and so do other publishers.

I am a journalist, I write articles about relationships. I would like to cooperate with you. Your website is full of useful information. I have some articles that I would like to post with a link. I think it would be really interesting for your target audience.

If you knew you’d get a rejection, why did you contact us?

Applying for this could deny me a chance to work with you and that’s why I decided to contact you.

We have never published poetry on WritersWeekly. If you were familiar with our publication, you’d know that. 

I want to write poems …..

You clearly know nothing about our website so you have wasted your time and mine.

I am interested in publishing articles in your websites related to travel. I would like to give information about the places to visit.

This writer’s confidence might be a bit inflated based on his punctuation skills…or lack thereof. 

I want to write for you to earn money am a confident writer

If you bothered to read the top of every page of our website, you’d see a big, bold link to our writer’s guidelines. 

How did I submit my article and the article should be on which subject

It’s always a good idea to write something unique. However, reading a publication’s writer’s guidelines (and using correct punctuation!) is always a good idea, too. 

I want to write something different from others

When asked why BookLocker should publish his book, this author responded:

“Because I need more money!”

Ha ha ha ha ha!

I have a good experience in copy typing and data managing and eidting

Actually, no, you can’t. And, writers who make that claim are not taken seriously, and always receive rejections. 

I can write on any of the topic given.

These spam submissions never work. We are certain hundreds of publications received the exact same email. We ignore them and so does everybody else. 

i like to broaden my knowledge through content writing.i think this is the best place.also i can earn. Can i submit the topics that i research on and earn from it?

Another “writer” who knows nothing about our publication. 

I wish to published a great article on health. I hope am availed with the opportunity? Thanks in anticipation

Yeah, it’s always a good idea to teach people how to do something for a living that “elevates stress.”

During this very crucial times, I want to help people become more enlightened about how writing can bring in money for them and to even elevate stress.

This query tells me this person is NOT an experienced writer. 

i am an experienced writer and read about your website in a article ..i just wish to write for your website

Using texting shorthand is extremely unprofessional.

I would really love to write for u guys.

A five-word query!

Where to submit the article

She needs to brush up on those “skills.”

I need a writing job. I can spend hours for writing . I have skills to write.

Between the errors and the legal risk, we wouldn’t TOUCH this manuscript!!!

i may have problem doing my book. i may not be able to do my book yet till we can figure how. its the information in my book thats not safe . we cant aford to get retaliation with the information i cant publish as of yet. what can i do. i have to ask about our situation

Fishing topics? Really?!

I’m writing to you because I’d love to contribute a guest post on your awesome website. I’ve been brainstorming some Fishing topics that I think your readers would get a ton of value from them.

That’s wonderful! Thank you for letting me know!

I am a writer

For the thousandth time, I am NOT a SIR! And, really? Virginity???

Sir,
I have studied and researched about various facts regarding virginity . I am a medical student. I want to publish an article about virginity and the social stigmas associated and the experience of people about losing / retaining their virginity .. And does it really matter among people in developing countries.

Wow! I’m out of breath just reading this ginormous run-on sentence!

— I am glad to communicate with you, I would like to publish my articles with you in the fields of stories of hope and success and self-development and highlight the impossible and support young people and motivate them towards production, work and construction..etc;

Um, pretty sure that is NOT the case.

In past all my clients love it my content

No, thank you. 

I’m a student but I’m a writer too i am writing a lot of articles ….n i really wanted to work with writers weekly….please give me a chance…

I would never hire a writer who can’t spell “please” correctly.

Hi, my question is how could i post my writings and blogs plz tell with details.my writing will be so helpful plzz answer me i am waiting.

Ha ha ha ha ha! At least he’s honest!!

I’m sorry my manuscript contains so many errors. I’ve been drinking a lot lately.

See more entertaining installments of World’s Worst Book Proposals and Query Letters RIGHT HERE.

Please tell us what you think in the comments box below! 🙂

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Angela Hoy is the publisher of WritersWeekly.com, the author of 19 books, and the co-owner of BookLocker.com (one of the original POD publishers that still gets books to market in less than a month), PubPreppers.com (print and ebook design for authors who truly want to self-publish), and Abuzz Press (the publishing co-op that charges no setup fees).

Angela lives on a 52' Irwin Center Cockpit Ketch (sailboat) with her family and pets. Keep up with her family's adventurous liveaboard lifestyle at GotNoTanLines.com

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Abuzz Press offers FAST and FREE book publication, but only accepts a small percentage of submissions, and only works with U.S. authors.

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2 Responses to "World’s Worst Query Letters and Book Proposals For July, 2020!"

  1. Pamela Allegretto  July 17, 2020 at 1:39 pm

    Thanks for the humorous diversion from all the bad/sad news surrounding us. We can all use a good laugh.

    Reply
  2. Werner  July 17, 2020 at 12:59 pm

    Is it possible that these query submissions are actually getting worse?

    Reply

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