I’m pretty backed up this week so I’m going to share another installment of our popular column, World’s Worst Book Proposals. Yes, these are real! Enjoy!
In the actual book – Chapter 1, Line 3:
A person who practices witchcraft is indeed a witch, yet what is a witch and how does a witch practices witchcraft.
Based on the quality of the book, we knew this author was being dishonest when they said:
I have had several college presidents, english professors, and friends proof read this book. Without exception, they have asked for copies to share with friends.
Not only is the author being dishonest (“several lawyers” my foot), but can you say “Legal Liability?”
I will promote my book as many hours as needed outside my immediate geographical area. I have had several lawyers read the book to make sure that the characters are not identified with local politicians.
You Have GOT to Be Kidding!
Is there a way to supplement the submission process that might allow me to send in a representative sample chapter instead? I am confident you will be able to judge the quality of my work from such. In addition to submitting a representative sample, I could provide a letter from my lawyer supporting the quality of my writing…
Is Your Keyboard Missing Some Keys?
i like to sell my e-book in digital download way through you. please send me how much i have to pay for that. will you creat the e-book for me , if i send you the book in ms word format.
IK’ve had my book edited byt college presidents, professors, published authors, and elected officials. Each found it extermely funny and has for personal copies.
Sour Grapes – After receiving a rejection letter, this author replied:
Truky sorry. By the way, I reject you too!
I had to ask an author to stop contacting me after I told him three times we were not interested in his book. He replied:
This will be my last email, Angela. I can see I’m beginning to annoy you. I don’t know what kind of experience you’ve been through in your past, but I’m sure it must be a traumatic one. Well, I’m sorry then.
For more smiles, see the previous installment of World’s Worst Book Proposals HERE.