World’s Worst Query Letters and Book Proposals For December 2015!

World’s Worst Query Letters and Book Proposals For December 2015!

Oh, yes! We know you’re excited!! Today, I’m going to share another installment of our popular column, World’s Worst Book Proposals and Query Letters. Featured below are real quotes from query letters and book proposals submitted to us over the past few weeks.

Yes, we can learn from others’ mistakes!

In case you’re a new reader, please know that we are a publication about writing and publishing FOR WRITERS. See if you can recognize the theme of errors below.

HAVING SPACE BAR ISSUES? PERHAPS OVERUSED FROM GAMING?
i want to become a writer.Why?Well,I wanna share my emotions AND i wanna earn some cash to get some virtual items on a game(CS:GO).

WHY WOULD A WRITING-RELATED PUBLICATION BE INTERESTED IN THIS ARTICLE?
Sufism-inspired Strategy to Curb Religious Extremism of ISIS

HER SHIFT AND PUNCTUATION KEYS ARE OBVIOUSLY BROKEN.
hi i would like very much to write for you i,am a great writer and really need a monetary outlet for my writing passion i know i can move your readers in some way. so i would love to purpose a partnership i can generate more visual traffic to this site via you tube thank you for your time

TIMESHARES? REALLY??
I wonder if you agree on a guest blogging about timeshares in your blog. T

DON’T DRINK AND QUERY!
I go by the name of (removed) living east africa tanzania im intrested with being a freelacer writer…in building construction carieer,because ihave enogh experience with the job…and i hold a certificate of masonry and bricklaying…please help me to find where ican be paid for this job

FOR STARTERS, YOU CAN USE CORRECT CAPITALIZATION AND PUNCTUATION. AND, YOU CAN READ THE WRITER’S GUIDELINES. THE LINK IS ON THE TOP OF EVERY PAGE ON OUR WEBSITE.
HI, I would like to write article. how can I start?

I’M SPEECHLESS…
Hello,I’m really interested in freelancing and earning money via writing and sharing life experiments,i have a wide experience in writing and specially English culture if i can write for your bloggers community that would be so great and i will be really satisfied,thank you for replying to my message asap take care,god bless you.

ANOTHER ONE WHO DIDN’T BOTHER TO RESEARCH THEIR TARGET MARKET.
Actually I’m writing a space fiction story if u r interested please let me know to get it published here is a glimpse of my story

OBVIOUSLY, THIS PERSON DID **NOT** READ OUR WRITER’S GUIDELINES.
Hello Miss Angela
I read your Writer’s Guidelines. But I did not understand how to write articles for your website. For example I must send you subject after your website accept I can write articles or I must write articles with my subject and send you for review. I do not know which kind of system your website. could explain for me.
Thanks for mentioning.

ANOTHER ONE WHO DIDN’T READ THE GUIDELINES…
I write tiny tales ranging from 10-20 to 50-80 words, as i believe that real capability lies in expressing through least possible lines. I own a personal blog of self too. It would be an honour for my writings to be published in your weekly and also get a deserving amount for that.  Wanted to know details about how do I start with this and how much will I be paid back. Expecting an early recognition of my Writings.

YOU WANT ME TO CONSIDER PURCHASING PREVIOUSLY PUBLISHED ARTICLES ON TOPICS COMPLETELY UNRELATED TO WRITING? NO, THANK YOU.
My website includes near by 350 articles on 24 different topics.
i wish you definitely like my work there. waiting for yr best reply

See more entertaining installments of World’s Worst Book Proposals and Query Letters HERE.

When Freelance Writers are Toxic, Unstable, and Abusive to Editors

Trying To “Trick” Editors Can (And Will) Backfire

QUERY LETTERS THAT WORKED! Real Queries That Landed $2K+ Writing Assignments

BOOK PROPOSALS THAT WORKED! Real Book Proposals That Landed $10K ñ $100K Publishing Contracts

Can’t Afford An Editor? Try These Four Fun Steps For A Much Cleaner Manuscript!



Got questions about Print On Demand and Self-publishing? Ask Angela Hoy.

About The Author

AngelaPortrait72dpismall_400x400

Angela Hoy is the publisher of WritersWeekly.com, the author of 19 books, and the co-owner of BookLocker.com (one of the original POD publishers that still gets books to market in less than a month), PubPreppers.com (print and ebook design for authors who truly want to self-publish), and Abuzz Press (the publishing co-op that charges no setup fees).

Angela has lived and traveled across the U.S. with her kids in an RV, settled in a river-side home in Bradenton, FL, and lived on a 52 ft Irwin sailboat. Angela now resides on a mountaintop in Northwest Georgia, where she plans to spend the rest of her days bird watching, gardening, hiking, and taking in all of the amazing sunrises.

WritersWeekly.com - the free marketing ezine for writers, which features new paying markets and freelance job listings every Wednesday.

BookLocker.com - According to attorney Mark Levine, author of The Fine Print, BookLocker is: "As close to perfection as you're going to find in the world of ebook and POD publishing. The ebook royalties are the highest I've ever seen, and the print royalties are better than average. BookLocker understands what new authors experience, and have put together a package that is the best in the business. You can't go wrong here. Plus, they're selective and won't publish any manuscript just because it's accompanied by a check. Also, the web site is well trafficked. If you can find a POD or epublisher with as much integrity and dedication to selling authors' books, but with lower POD publishing fees, please let me know."

Abuzz Press offers FAST and FREE book publication, but only accepts a small percentage of submissions, and only works with U.S. authors.

PubPreppers.com - "We Prep, You Publish!" Print and ebook design for authors who truly want to self-publish. Offers formatting and design services only, and then provides simple instructions for authors on where to sign up to have the print and ebook editions printed/listed/sold. Cut out the middle man. Keep 100% of what bookstores pay for your book!

Angela's POD Secrets Revealed Series can be found HERE.

Have a POD Book with another publisher? See if BookLocker can give you a better deal. (BookLocker offers "disgruntled author discounts" to those who want to move from other POD services.)


See BookLocker's publishing packages HERE.


ANGELA ON TWITTER https://twitter.com/AngelaHoy


BOOKLOCKER ON FACEBOOK - Provides links to free excerpts!
https://www.facebook.com/booklockerbooks


ANGELA ON FACEBOOK
https://www.facebook.com/angela.hoy.750


ANGELA ON LINKEDIN
https://www.linkedin.com/pub/angela-hoy/78/719/390


Angela is the creator of the Original 24-Hour Short Story Contest!
https://24hourshortstorycontest.com/



Read More Of Angela's Articles HERE



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